So now you've won…

To my fellow Americans who voted for Barack Obama…
It is great and wonderful that you want the government to give everything to you. I'm so glad for you that the government will be paying for children's shows, paying the bills for those who choose not to work, paying for your condoms and abortions. For those of you who voted for Obama because he is black, because he is "hip," or just because he was the Democratic Party nominee - I am happy for you that he won.
To my fellow Americans who voted for Mitt Romney…
My heartfelt condolences. Not because Romney lost but because the choice was made by a contingent of Americans who do not understand the necessity of prioritizing. Citizens who feel they are entitled simply because they are American. Citizens who are like spoiled children - they want what they want no matter the cost and have no comprehension of the cost or that there even is a cost. These citizens are like the Lost Boys of Peter Pan, who run wild with no responsibility for their actions because they have had no authority figure in their life to hold them responsible. Unfortunately in real life the stakes are way too high and left unchecked these entitlements will cause the American way of life to come crashing down around our heads. Sooner or later someone will have to pay the piper. Sooner or later that someone will be you and me. Left unchecked, liberal policies will cause the elderly to be cast aside because there will be no money to pay for them, liberal policies will cause other countries to crumble to fanatical regimes because there will be no money to place our military where they can act as a deterrent. Liberal policies will bankrupt our savings, retirement and pensions (if they haven't been already). Liberal policies will destroy our educational system and scientific endeavors. Our energy dependency on foreign countries will increase, further incapicitating the stature of America in the world and weakening our ability to stave off foreign encroachment upon our soil and financial stability.
So what is the answer? How can we stop these insidious inevitabilities? The only way is to elect conservative representation in Washington. Specifically, maintain conservative control of the House of Representatives and elect conservative candidates to the Senate. The priority of our government representatives must be to reverse our nations financial woes. To do that they must cancel funding for non-necessary programs such as the arts and the sciences, and cease funding grants. They cannot bail out companies that are financially dire (such as the auto industry), instead businesses must be allowed to go through the process of bankruptcy which should leave them stream-lined and financially secure if they are a viable business. The size and scope of government itself must be reduced.
We all must sacrifice to become a stronger nation. For myself the environment and the arts are extremely important but I would rather sacrifice them temporarily in order to save them permanently. We must, as a nation, put our priorities in proper order. First and foremost is national security and that can only come with financial security. We have dealt our country a tremendous blow by electing a president who subscribes to policies that weaken our nation. It is past time to hold our leaders feet to the fire and make them responsible, it is OUR responsibility to put forth viable responsible candidates in the next mid-term election and send them to Washington. We as a nation, not "we as a Republican" or "We as a Democrat" or "We as a conservative," but we as a nation must be responsible Americans even in the face of so many non-responsible Americans. Seek out and endorse responsible candidates NOW!

Fear and Loathing in America

  Recently I purchased the 4 DVD set of Billy Jack movies. For those of you younger generations the name and character of "Billy Jack" may not phase you but for my generation the character symbolized the essence of what freedom means as an American. Billy Jack was cool and hip. He wanted to do his own thing and encouraged you to do your own thing as well. He fought prejudice at all levels of society but he hated violence and only used violence as a means of self-defense or for justice when the system broke down. The films spanned the sixties and seventies and dealt with the very real issues America faced at the time - racial and sexual prejudices, political corruption, the stigma of a questionable war and societies intolerance of any movement deemed radical by society. Sound familiar? As I watched those movies I became aware of how much the world we live in today is the same as the world of that time. Only now the vile rhetoric and violence seems much more instantaneous due to the internet, smart phones and satellite TV.
  Today in America we spread vicious cartoons and photos via Facebook of issues we each deem to be a radical departure from what we believe the world should be. The America founded in the 1700's on the basis of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness no longer exists. We are labeled liberal or conservative and to each group the other group is not to be tolerated and their voice is to be shut down and silenced. Tolerance is no longer a bastion of a free American democracy and has become not just a dirty word but a filthy word. We no longer have the assurance of freedom of speech in America. The liberal left hatefully assault the conservative right for wanting to be fiscally responsible in government, and for being intolerant of sexual ideologies while the right also eschews intolerance of the left for the liberals abasement of biblical principles and their desire to obliterate the border between the US and Mexico.

  No longer can an American voice his or her opinion or belief without suffering persecution from some faction who possesses an opposing view. Each day I listen and watch the news broadcasts, I read posts on Facebook and listen when I'm out in public and every day I get sick to my stomach because of the hate and intolerance we as Americans have for each other. A watched a video of a man berating a Chick-fil-A worker and it made me nauseous. The next day I hear he was fired from his job for his actions. Why? Does he not have the right to say what he wishes to? I certainly don't agree with his action or what he said but he has the right to say it no matter how stupid or foolish it made him seem. Kudos to the young lady he berated however, she showed great poise and professionalism under fire.

  A writer at a Florida paper had his blog removed from the internet supposedly because of the position he takes against conservatives who do not believe in gay marriage. If that is truly the reason for his blogs removal then the paper should be ashamed of itself. I believe marriage should only be between a man and a woman but I do not have the right to force my beliefs on others who don't feel the same and they should not have the right to belittle me for my stand. It is alright to believe in something different, it should be our strength as a nation that we can work together for common goals despite our differences. Sadly though we as a nation have degenerated into a morass of undignified, hateful bullies and it has to stop or we are doomed to follow the paths of the great world empires of history and vanish. It is time we stood up as a nation and love our neighbor. If we find ourselves on opposite sides of the same fence we need to still show good grace and poise and not hate and spite. The answer is to love. It is not an easy answer and to many it is cliché but that does not negate it as the solution.

Mothers Day

My Mom - Charlotte Wiggins

I am fortunate that at the time of this writing my mother is still with us (though it is amazing to me how that can be after riding around town with her driving!). I am more fortunate still that after 21 years of living alone in Virginia since dad passed away that she has finally sold her home and moved to the same town my brother and I live in. I no longer have to worry about her stroking out while cutting her grass as her homeowners association takes care of that now. I no longer have to worry about her being alone all the time or being a target of a break-in (the house she sold was right behind a 7/11 store). When she had minor surgeries I couldn't be there to help her out at home, now I can. Having my mother nearby is indeed a blessing.
But I would like to address this blog entry mainly to my dear friends who's mothers are no longer with us and in particular those who are going through their first Mothers Day without their mother. Mostly what I have to say is nothing they haven't already heard or known but sometimes it helps to be reminded of what a blessing of having a mother really is.
For you, Mothers Day (this year in particular) should be a celebration of the life of the wonderful woman who gave you life. It is a celebration of the values she passed on to you in your youth, a celebration of someone who soothed your ills, fed you, took you places even when she didn't feel good, taught you manners, listened to you spill out your heart when it was broken, cheered the loudest at your ball games or other special events. Mother's Day is a celebration of the love she showed you her entire life - even during those low times when in retrospect you think you didn't deserve to be loved. It is a celebration of the example she set for you that helped mold you into the adult you are today.
The Bible says in the book of Ecclesiastes, chapter 3 "To every thing there is season and a time to every purpose under the heaven." The remaining verses further illustrate that there is a time for everything, a time to mourn and a time to weep. But it also reminds us there is a time to rejoice (a time to laugh and a time to dance). Being human means there will be an element of mourning for you this Mothers Day because your loss is heavy, but this day is meant for rejoicing so while you mourn be sure to take time to rejoice and celebrate the wonderful woman who gave you life as well. Take time to celebrate Mothers Day!

ADDENDUM: it is now 2014 and days away from Mothers Day again. In the two years since I wrote the above my mother was diagnosed with an aggressive form of cancer for which she had to have her right jaw removed and a bone from her leg removed and installed in place of the jaw. She endured days upon days of grueling therapy, lost her ability to talk clearly (although she is understandable) and eventually got the cancer free proclamation which was short lived when the cancer returned a few months ago. Once again she is enduring the chemo treatments and thankfully the doctor is pleased with her progress and treatment. Time and again in the past two years I have considered how fortunate I am to still have her with us (even though she may not feel the same when I'm driving her around! Lol). Time and again I marvel at her tenacity and determination in fighting the cancer and also to not let it make her depressed. She is strong of mind, will and faith as well as an anchor in my life. Yes, I am indeed fortunate to not only have her still with us, but also to have her as my mom.

ADDENDUM #2: Today is Mother's Day 2015 and it is the first without mom who passed away last month on April 6th. I was so privileged to be able to move in and take care of her for the last six months of her life. I learned so much more about my mother than I could have dreamed possible and I re-realized things about her I had often taken for granted simply because she was there. I was fortunate enough to eulogize her at two different memorials for her. Life goes on and each day I must get out of bed and go about my day, but always there is a void where once there was my mother. That void is just in my mind though because she is not physically here, in my heart it is a different story. My heart has no void, it is filled with love and thanks for having been blessed to have the wonderful mother I had and knowing one day I'll see her and my father once more. But as I stated when I first wrote this blog entry - today I will remember my mother and I will rejoice in the love that she had for me and the example she set for me as well. Happy Mother's Day mom.

Pet Peeves, Volume 1

I say Volume 1 cause I know just as soon as I publish this I'll think of a dozen more pet Peeves I had forgotten about. So with that in mind I'm going to just periodically post five things that irritate me and get under my skin.

1. People who can't count. You know who I'm talking about. You need to run to the store for a single item only to find the line for 10 items and under line has one lady with a cart filled high with groceries. I've been known to ask them if they ever made it out of first grade. They don't like it when you do that, but I really don't care cause I don't like it when they get in the short line either.
2. People who don't use turn signals. I get so irritated sitting at a stop light or sign and can't go because of an oncoming vehicle with no turn signals on and then they turn. Meanwhile I've been sitting there burning about $5 worth of gas when I could have driven on had they indicated they were going to turn. USE YOUR SIGNALS PEOPLE!
3. Businesses that require a minimum purchase for you to use your debit card for the purchase. Really? Who carries cash anymore? All I wanted was a 2 liter or a bag of chips but you're going to make me spend more money to purchase it? No way! Not only am I going to walk away and leave the merchandise on the counter and make you restock the shelf with it but you have also just lost money because I will no longer patronize your business - even if I plan to buy a whole case of sodas and spend much more money, I'm going to spend it at your competitor.
4. WHISPERERS! I despise whisperers. You know who I'm talking about. They'll stand right in front of you and whisper an entire conversation to each other just loud enough that you can catch a word or two but not loud enough to get the full story. So very rude! If you need to speak to someone in private - do it in PRIVATE!
5. Drivers who don't use the zip rule. Well that's what I call it anyway. The zip rule is when two lanes of traffic merge into one the vehicles should merge together alternately - one from the left lane, one from the right, one from the left, one from the right and so on - they merge like zipping up a zipper. Today though people are just too rude and in too much of a hurry and don't want to take the time to be safe and as a result they all try to be the first one at the head of the line. Which leads me to another pet peeve (but we'll still consider it part of this one) - people who drive on the shoulder of the road to get ahead of everyone else when the interstate is backed up. Do like I do and just pull over onto the shoulder a little bit, enough so no one can get by - you'll enjoy pissing the idiots off… I do. :)

Well, that's all for now. I'll come up with more shortly and post them in a month or so. Have some of your own? Feel free to comment on this blog and share with everyone!

Losing Sight of the Point

 A few things have come across my scope of events and happenings in the world in the past few days that just beg for me to indulge and write an opinion on. Here is one of them.
  I came in late on the whole Rush Limbaugh fiasco that happened last Wednesday (Feb. 29, 2012). With all the uproar about what he said I just had to do some research and get the facts. Now I'm not a Rush advocate, though I do agree with him on an occasional issue as well as disagree from time to time and to be honest I just don't care enough about him to listen to what he has to say and follow him like so many do and I feel he is a loudmouth arrogant bully.

  As I understand it, during his broadcast that day he was commenting on the testimony of a Georgetown law student, Sandra Fluke, at a Capitol Hill hearing. Fluke, who is an advocate for government funding of contraception had submitted a written testimony to the committee (House Committee on Oversight and Government Reform) in which she "argued in favor of requiring all private insurance plans to cover contraception coverage, even religious institutions." She further argued that in the course of three years of law school, student birth control could cost $3000 in some instances.
  Fluke's statements in her testimony drove Limbaugh to make the following statement on his show:

"What does it say about the college co-ed Fluke, who goes before a congressional committee and essentially says she must be paid to have sex? What does that make her? It makes her a slut, right? It makes her a prostitute. She wants to be paid to have sex. She's having so much sex, she can't afford the contraception. She wants you and me and the taxpayers to pay her to have sex." Rush Limbaugh as quoted by CNN.com

   The sad part of Rush's statement is that his point was lost amid the derogatory slurs at Ms. Fluke. His argument would have been profoundly more persuasive if he had left out the colorful name-calling and stuck to the facts. Fluke's position is she wants the government to require insurance companies to cover the cost of contraceptives. This position dictates that sex is a necessary, even required, activity which must be undertaken in order to graduate. Now I'm all for sex, in fact I think the world would be a much better place if everyone could have all the sex they wanted but it is not the governments role to intervene in the sexual life of the citizenry. Participation in sex is not necessary in order to enroll, attend or graduate from any school or university and for Ms. Fluke to assert that the government should impose upon insurance companies to provide coverage to allow students to have safe sex is ludicrous. If students are going to have sex then yes, they need to practice safe sex - and they should pay for it out of their own pocket rather than cause insurance rates for everyone else to go up in order to pay for it. At some point we each must be responsible for the things we do or don't do and we should be mature enough to take responsibility for our mistakes, be it the result of sex or some other decision we make which results in a mistake or problem of some kind.
  Rush was right in his position on the matter but the words he chose to use to relay his position were in extreme poor taste. I don't believe Rush should be taken off the air but I do applaud those advertisers who have chosen to remove their advertising dollars from his show and in effect force him to take responsibility for his immature remarks.

Men love flowers too!

  Now I like to think of myself as a manly man. I like the outdoors, sports, Jack Daniels, westerns, action films and fast cars. When I'm in the department store I head straight for the tool department. If it's more upscale and doesn't have a tool department but does have a sporting goods or outdoors department I'll hang there instead. In other words I have absolutely no doubts about my masculinity. Even so there is a part of me that enjoys things normally associated with those of the fairer sex. For instance, there are some chick flicks I like such as When Harry Met Sally or Thelma and Louise. There is however one area where I think women are totally lacking in understanding about many men when it comes to Valentine's Day - flowers. Believe me, men love to get flowers on Valentine's Day and more specifically they love to get them at work. Actually men love to get flowers on any day but just like women, Valentine's is special. It's not the flowers themselves we like so much as the attention we get in the office when they are delivered, or when you're seated at the restaurant waiting for her and she walks in with a big bouquet for you. Oh, sure there will be those guys who are snickering about you getting flowers, but those are the same guys who are probably going to be going home to an empty house at the end of the day and in all likelihood haven't slept with a woman they didn't have to pay for in eons. Getting that flower arrangement is a statement for men, just like it is for women, a statement that says "yes I have a wonderful person in my life who knows how to treat me right and that makes me a very lucky man (or woman)."
  So, ladies, take pause and consider the value and benefits you'll reap this Valentine's Day when he discovers the flowers left at the receptionists desk has a card with his name on it! You can thank me later :)

Three little dots...

  One of the the great loves of my life contacted me last night on Facebook. Twenty-four years have passed since we last spoke, not because of any bad feelings though, our lives just followed different paths. During the course of our chat on Facebook we caught up as best we could through that forum. She's happily married with three beautiful kids now. Trying to fill her in on my life over these many years was difficult because for some strange reason I wanted her to be proud of me. I have enjoyed life but have little to show for my years and quite a few less than happy events so I worked around those parts as best I could, often using the common notation of three dots (you know - "..." ) to indicate there is more information. She made the comment  "those three dots can cover a lot more than can be typed on fb." That simple statement really packed a punch for me. How true it is! There was so much more I wanted to tell her and hear from her and yet all I could do was type three little dots.

  I believe those three dots are indicative of how we are losing our ability to communicate in an informative and meaningful way in the 21st century. Several times I've had arguments with female friends over something I texted or didn't text in a message. We try to shorten and abbreviate just about everything we do and it only serves to make life more complicated - especially when I'm dealing with my female friends (sorry ladies it's true - my guy friends could care less about a deeper or hidden meaning behind my emoticons and abbreviations). As a result I try not to live by my phone anymore. I answer fewer and fewer text messages and when I do I keep it to short simple answers, questions and statements. Of course that has it's drawbacks to as a couple of my lady friends want to know why I'm being so curt when I text them! It seems I can't win!

I love women...

Bethany, 1986
Pencil drawing by Charlton

 

  I love women. I suppose I'm not unlike most other heterosexual men in this world - or at least in the civilized world - but I tend to believe I take my love of women a step further. It's not just that I love women but rather that I adore them. Always have. I put women on a metaphoric pedestal and in a sense, worship them.
  I freely admit that I'm a chauvinist. Now there are different meanings to the word chauvinism, including the one we all are most familiar with: smug irrational belief in the superiority of one's own sex.* It is, however, another definition of the word that I associate myself with: biased devotion to any group, attitude, or cause.* To me that means I believe in opening doors for women, not letting them carry heavy loads or do manual labor that requires brawn. It also means that I treat them with the same respect I would afford to any man who is worthy of my respect. In my mind it is a mortal sin to raise a hand against a woman, even pretending, to strike her. I tend to be a gentle man but if there were one thing that could drive me to kill another man it would be seeing him strike a woman. There never has been and never will be an instance that could justify a male hitting a woman. Period. If a man finds himself in a position where he is being threatened with violence from a female, well, God gave him two legs to use and run as fast as he can from her. Some might think a man running from a woman is an act of cowardice or humiliating but the truth is to do so would show strength.
  I also believe it is important to teach our children these same principles. When I was married and raising my two boys I made sure they learned and understood the value of never hitting a woman.
  Women are equal to men in many ways and more often than not I believe them to be far superior to men. It has been my observation that generally most women tend to be smarter than men, they are more focused, logical and more patient than men. 
  Obviously I love women for their sexual nature too, but it goes far beyond sex. The Johnny Depp film Don Juan deMarco is a glorious little movie that presents the title characters view of women in a way that could be my own. One line though sums it up nice and succinctly:

By seeing beyond what is visible to the eye. Now there are those, of course, who do not share my perceptions, it's true. When I say that all my women are dazzling beauties, they object. The nose of this one is too large; the hips of another, they are too wide; perhaps the breasts of a third, they are too small. But I see these women for how they truly are... glorious, radiant, spectacular, and perfect, because, I am not limited by my eyesight.

-Don Juan deMarco as portrayed by Johnny Depp

   Though I certainly don't profess to share in Don Juan's success at sexual conquest, I do share in his proclivity to appreciate the fairer sex. It is the way a woman's blouse drapes around her breasts, or the way her evening gown accentuates her hips or her necklace lays against her neck, these are the visions that make manifest a woman's beauty. While a naked woman has her allure, I am inclined to become more sexually attracted to a woman who knows how to wear clothes that accentuate her shape and form. As an example take actress Kate Hudson in two different films. In Fool's Gold there is a beach scene where she is in a bikini which she wears well and looks great in and obviously showing lots of skin. Next consider her appearance in How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days when she appears at her apartment door in a yellow backless dress. The dress accentuates her shape and makes her far more alluring and sexual than the bikini in Fool's Gold. I suppose this concept is why I've always admired the women's fashions of the 40's & 50's.
  Watching women is probably my favorite past-time, so ladies if you see me out and about and I seem to be staring at you, please forgive me - I'm just admiring God's most glorious creation.

Signs for stupid people

  On my way home today I passed a new sign which stated "See the Light, Move to the Right" with a graphic of a head-on view of a fire truck with lights blinking. When I read it, the words just seemed to hit me the wrong way. I'm tired of everything being dumbed down so the stupid people can understand it too. Same goes for the "Click it or Ticket" slogan. I'm tired of it. I mean if people are really so dumb that they can't remember to pull over when they see emergency vehicle lights or if they are so stupid they don't understand that riding without a seat-belt warrants a ticket if you're pulled over, well if people are just that stupid then I don't want them on the same roads with me and they need to have their license taken away! Seriously! If someone is so stupid they have to have signs like that to remind them of the rules of the road then they shouldn't be driving. Then again I suppose I can be thankful I don't live somewhere that the people feel the need to have a sign that tells me not to cross when the cars are still moving. Really? No! You're kidding! I thought the idea was to try and cross the street while the cars are zipping by and try not to get hit in the process.

If you get hit, you lose! I think we should have signs put up that say "Cross Only When Traffic Is Moving" - maybe then we'd get rid of some of the stupid people that are throwing the curve way off and making it necessary to have stupid signs!
  I really think if the government is going to waste our money by putting up stupid signs I'd rather they spent it on magnetic signs people have to put on their car when they do something stupid. Cops and judges could sentence people to drive around with a big magnetic sign on the car door that says "I got this sign because I was STUPID and was texting while driving." Or how about a sign that says "I didn't "Click it" and all I got was this STUPID sign!"

  I guess if we have to have stupid signs though they should also be funny and give us something to laugh about. Like the sign in Europe at a train or subway stop that says "Keep back from the platform edge - or you may get sucked off." Seems to me that one would have everyone lining the edge of the platform!

Stereotyping is not a bad thing

  We've all done it. We've all looked at someone else and formed an opinion about them based solely on what we see. Blacks, whites, Jews, old, young, rich, poor, Mexican, Arabic, Muslim, Christian and the list could go on. Stereotyping people is nothing new and chances are pretty damn good you've practiced it several times already today in some shape, form or fashion. Stereotyping is a natural part of our makeup. We take information, be it aural, visual, olfactorily, or tactile or even information from some previous encounter that has embedded itself in our brain, whatever the source - we make decisions based on that information. Stereotyping is not necessarily a bad thing. Using an oft cited example to illustrate, suppose you are walking down a street and a group of leather-clad, rough looking men are hanging out and talking around their motorcycles on one side of the street, but the other side of the street is populated by women pushing babies in strollers, men are dressed in suits and a couple of priests are talking. You have to go down the street on one side or the other. Chances are pretty good you're going to choose the side of the street with the babies, businessmen and priests.The reason you choose that side is stereotyping. It doesn't matter to you that the bikers on the other side of the street are actually gathering at the start of a benefit ride to raise money for a child they don't know who is dying of cancer. You made your decision based on a stereotype.
  Stereotyping is a method of making a judgement based on current knowledge and/or previous experience. That knowledge may be in error OR it could be based on fact. Either way it is playing the percentages. Insurance companies do it every day. You may be the most economical driver in the world and always careful to go the speed limit but the second you shell out the money for that hot new Dodge Challenger or Charger your insurance is going to go through the roof. Why? Because insurance actuaries have stereotyped you as a speed demon eager to do the quarter mile against every car next to you at a stoplight - simply because you are driving a muscle car. It may not be fair but the insurance company is playing the percentages.
  Author Ninos Malek has an excellent article on his blog that illustrates this even better. You can read it here.
  In recent years another form of stereotyping has often made headlines: Racial Profiling. Whenever racial profiling is mentioned it is unfairly heralded as a negative. Truth is though, racial profiling is stereotyping. It shouldn't be seen as racist but as a logical tool in authorities arsenal to prevent crime and terrorism or to catch criminals and terrorists. Sure it can be maddening, even insulting if you're on the receiving end of profiling but in the interest of bringing a criminal to justice or preventing a terrorist act it is more than justifiable. A low-rider Malibu filled with a bunch of tattooed, hairnet wearing Hispanic men cruising slowly through any neighborhood at three o'clock in the morning is a prime target for the police to pull over and question. Why? Because, if the cops were doing their job they would be stereotyping the car full of Hispanics in the interest of public safety. Do those men have the right to be cruising around at 3:00 am? Sure, and after a cursory stop by the police they should be free to continue cruising. Any police officer or other figure in a like position who does not profile - they are not doing their job. When you think about it though, isn't that what the police do every time they parade a line-up in front of a one-way mirror? Yes it is and it should not be vilified.
  At the start of this blog entry I said "Stereotyping is not necessarily a bad thing" and I stand by that statement. What is a bad thing though are people who choose to rely solely on their stereotypical view of something and not be open to additional information which might change their view. These are the bigots of the world - people who are so close-minded about someone or something that they refuse to consider alternative or additional information that might possibly change their perspective or their stereotypical views. Stereotyping is a tool we use to build an opinion. You wouldn't build a house with just a hammer and you shouldn't build an opinion with only one tool.

My Bucket List

  We all have one but it took the 2007 Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman film The Bucket List to give an identifying moniker to the list of things we dream of doing before we die or "kick the bucket." The film also did one other thing that I feel is important - it depicted the characters actually writing down their lists not just saying what is on their list. Everyone should have a Bucket List and have it written down and placed somewhere that it is easy to access from time to time. One thing I've learned about a Bucket List over the years is that quite often some things on it will change or seem more or less important. Sometimes things will drop off your list and sometimes you'll add to it. The point of a Bucket List isn't so much to do things as it is to dream about doing them. Don't get me wrong, I think it is important to actually DO the things on your Bucket List but I think it is also very important to keep yourself mentally young by always dreaming about doing the things on the list.

Ice Diving in Antarctica

  So, that being said, here are the dreams that make up my Bucket List.

1. SCUBA dive the Great Blue Hole off the coast of Belize.
2. Travel to Antarctica and do an ice dive.
3. Travel to Europe and visit The Volkswagen plant and museum in Germany, the Louvre in Paris and kiss a beautiful woman at the top of the Eiffel Tower, take a canal ride Venice and tour Rome, visit the Normandy coast where the allies came ashore on D-Day, tour Athens, Greece.
4. Sail around the world.
5. Fly in an open cockpit vintage bi-plane and actually take the controls for a bit myself.
6. Drive a Model T Ford.
7. Get cast as an extra in a Hollywood blockbuster.
8. Ride a motorcycle the entire length of Route 66 from Chicago to Los Angeles.
9. Fly an ultralight aircraft.
10. Talk about diving, the oceans, and shipwrecks over cigars and tequila with my favorite living author Clive Cussler.

  Obviously some of my dreams are attainable and some I'll have to really work at. Mine aren't in any particular order and I've left a few off that are too personal to share in this forum but I'd be willing to bet you have some interesting ones on your list as well so take a moment and share them with me.

NO excuses! - YOU'RE responsible!

  Aren't you just a little bit tired of people too scared to take responsibility for what they say or do? I know I am. I'm tired of reading in the news about people  who don't take responsibility for the words that come out of their mouth or the actions they get caught in or doing. It seems the more people get caught or called on something the less merit the words of their apologies have. I don't for a second believe most people are truly sorry for what they said or did that caused them to feel they had to apologize. Sure they're sorry they got caught or they're sorry they lose their job or social standing because of what they said or did but I don't believe they are truly sorry for the actual words that came out of their mouth or the actual actions they did.
  Take a look in the news just about any day and you'll find someone apologizing because they were on the hot seat. Look at that congressman Weiner (is it pronounced "weener" like a hot dog or "winer" like a cry-baby? guess either way would be appropriate). The guy was evidently sending "messages and photos of explicit nature with about six women in the last three years"according to CNN.com. That in and of itself isn't so surprising in this day and age but the fact that he is married (to a pretty and exotic looking lady in my opinion) and a member of congress puts him in the frying pan. If those text or emails and pics or whatever it was had not been leaked do you honestly think he'd be apologizing? Now he wants to pull a "Tiger Woods" and seek help. Really? Dude, just own up to being a horn dog and keep on sending the "explicit" pictures and texts cause you know you're only sorry you got caught.
  The fake apologies are running amuk! I don't believe for one second actor Tracy Morgan is sorry for his recent anti-gay remarks, nor do I think Don Imus is sorry for calling the 2007 UCON women's basketball team "nappy-headed ho's." Okay maybe they are sorry they said it but I think they do believe what they said.
  NASCAR is bulging with curt words, sharp tounges and even flying fists and I get sick everytime I hear them apologize for their words or actions. Come on guys! Own what you say! Team owner Richard Childress kinda got it right after going after creep-o Kyle Busch recently. He stopped short of apologizing for going after Busch, instead owning up to his actions saying "I take all the responsibility for my actions last week. I am very passionate about this sport. I am passionate about my race teams, our fans and I let my emotions ... come in front of my passion. But that is behind us." Basically that means he said "hey I did it - now let's move on." We need more men like Childress.
  Now while I've had enough of Charlie Sheen in the news this year I must say that I admire him for not apologizing for leading the life he obviously enjoys. He does the coke, he does several porn stars at the same time - and he enjoys it! So kudo's to Charlie Sheen for NOT apologizing. Are you listening Tiger? Jesse James? Gov. Spitzer? Representative Weener? Come on dudes, grow a pair and man up!
  My whole point behind this litany is that each and every one of us is responsible for the things we do and the things we say. Sure you should apologize if you say or do something wrong but that is only the first step - you also have to follow through and make sure your actions and words are never repeated. Make your apology actually mean something. When you apologize you are responsible for those words of sorrow crossing your lips just as much as you are responsible for the words that made the apology necessary. This much I can tell you... if I say it I mean it and if what I say turns out to be something I regret then you can know my apology is real because I'm responsible for what I say.

Blondes vs Brunettes

Betty and Veronica
A classic example of blonde versus brunette

  I used to have a co-worker who had an affinity for brunette's (though his wife was blonde) and he was fond of saying "there's no net like a brunette." I have likewise held the same general pre-disposition for brunettes during my life. I've only dated a couple of blondes over the years and even though a couple is not really enough to formulate an opinion I must say that they did indeed tend to be more fun. I have long held a theory about blondes and brunettes but mind you this theory in no way seeks to make a statement that one is better than the other, it's just a theory that speaks to the way we are pre-disposed to stereotype blondes and brunettes.
  To understand this theory you have to appreciate the different qualities of dark and light, black and white, night and day. You see, symbolically black represents darkness and in darkness not everything can be known because the darkness hides some things. On the other hand white represents light and with light everything is revealed. So, subconsciously a brunette is seen as mysterious because subconsciously the darkness of her hair represents that which is not know.
  A brunette is often full of surprises since you can't know everything about her. She is often more serious and studious than her light haired counterpart, seeming to weigh and consider all information before making a decision and in turn she is taken more seriously by others. To illustrate this I did a Google image search for "mysterious woman" and of the first 20 images of women all but three were brunette.
  Meanwhile the blonde is seen as an 'open book' because her hair represents that which is revealed because of the light. The blonde has no secrets, she has a light and airy persona, meaning a personality that is more bubbly and vivacious. She is more likely to make snap decisions and deal with the results or consequences later.
  I truly believe the subliminal perception we have of brunettes and blondes is the basis for the stereotypes we have today of these women, especially blondes. I'm sure you're thinking "what about blondes who are naturally brunettes." Well I feel my theory still holds up because a brunette who goes blonde tends to take on more of the persona and traits I've attributed to that hair color. The same goes for blondes who turn brunette.
  I've often said "brunette's are the ones you take home to meet your parents, the ones you build a life with, blondes are the ones you have fun with, the ones you enjoy life with." Neither one is better or worse than the other, they both have their merits, their value, their desirability.
  And then there's the redheads... :)